They Need Our Protection, Too
By Melanie Heitkamp, LCSW
April is National Child Abuse Prevention Month.
When we talk about child abuse, the focus is almost always on young children—and for good reason. The data is clear. Infants and very young children are the most vulnerable to abuse and neglect, and the most likely to experience serious harm. They depend entirely on adults for their safety, and when that safety is compromised, the consequences can be devastating.
When I began doing child protection work in Mercer County in the early 1980s, the work looked very different. The system was new, the laws were still being understood, and intervention was not always accepted. Children were frequently viewed as an extension of their parents rather than individuals with rights, and stepping into those situations could be met with resistance—sometimes even threats. The work was difficult, but it marked the beginning of a shift. Since then, we have made important progress in recognizing the need to protect young children.
The question is: what happens when those children become youth?
Where the Response Breaks Down
For youth, the issue is not whether harm is happening—it is how that harm is understood and responded to.
A report is made, but the situation is labeled “conflict.” A young person reacts, and their response becomes the focus. An incident escalates, and responsibility is shared, even when there is a clear imbalance of power.
Even when abuse has occurred, the message youth often receive is that they are “safe enough.” Safe enough to stay. Safe enough to manage it. Safe enough to figure it out.
Youth remain legally bound to their household, which limits their ability to create real safety. When they try to assert control, create distance, or protect themselves, those actions are often seen as defiance or delinquency rather than responses to harm.
This creates a dangerous dynamic.
Youth may be blamed for what is happening to them.
They may be expected to manage situations that are not safe.
Or they may decide the only way to protect themselves is to leave.
What We Need to Do Differently
To be clear, we do not need more youth entering foster care.
What we need are more options—real, accessible pathways that give young people a way forward when where they are is not safe.
Approaches like kinship care or semi-independent living can provide safe, stable environments while allowing youth to stay connected to school, relationships, and their community. These options create space for support and stability while helping youth move toward independence in a way that is intentional and supported.
Choices matter. When youth have options, they have something to move toward—not just something to escape. That is where hope begins.
And they should not be expected to navigate unsafe environments on their own.
Broadening Our Definition of Protection
We have made meaningful progress in how we protect young children. The next step is making sure that same commitment extends to youth so they are not overlooked or left without options when they need support the most.
They need our protection, too—and they need us to build a system that gives them more than two choices: stay or leave.
About the Author
A message from Mark Heinert, Executive Director
Having worked in child protection in Kidder and Burleigh Counties in the 1990s, I’ve seen firsthand how quickly responsibility can shift onto youth—how their behaviors are often used to explain or even justify the harm they’re experiencing. That tension has stayed with me throughout my career.
Adolescents are not helpless in the same way young children are, but that does not mean they are fully equipped to navigate unsafe situations on their own. They need support that recognizes both their growing independence and their need for safety.
At Youthworks, programs like Diversion—a newer program now available in Minot, Bismarck, Grand Forks, and Fargo—work with youth identified as Children in Need of Services (CHINS) to do exactly that: helping them build decision-making skills while ensuring they have the structure and support necessary to stay safe.
The challenge in front of us is finding that balance: empowering youth to have a stronger voice in their lives, while not losing sight of our responsibility to protect them. Both must exist together.
If you or someone you know may need support, we encourage you to reach out to any of our Youthworks locations. No young person should have to navigate these challenges alone.
